Chapter Twelve: The Mad Monk's Deluded Ambitions — The Foolish Soothsayer's Empty Conspiracy

To the tune of "Crow Cries at Night":

How many springs and summers has the night moon witnessed?

How many rises and falls has the setting sun endured?

Busily men weave their pointless dreams,

Squandering thought on what will never be.

Rotten sparks flare vainly in the void;

The frog in the well dreams of soaring sky.

Side by side they stare at the execution ground in Yan,

Their blood seeping into the dark and yellow earth.

It has always been said: Heaven's favour has its chosen vessel, and the great throne cannot be seized by force. Consider Li Jing the Duke of Wei and Zhang the Curly-Beard — what heroes they were! And yet they lived in the dying days of the Sui, when bold men contended for the deer of empire and each fancied the realm was his for the taking. The moment they set eyes on Li Shimin, one bent the knee and followed the dragon, while the other fled to lands beyond the sea. Li Mi, too, was a hero of his age, yet because he could not read the times and refused to submit to Tang, he was swiftly captured and destroyed. How much more foolish, then, for some petty scoundrel to covet the sacred vessel in an age of unified peace and tranquility — it would be like hurling an egg against a stone, only to see it shattered on the instant.

Yet there is something to be said: Heaven sometimes produces a madman who, whether he succeeds or fails, is born under a striking omen and enters the world bearing some strange mark. And when a band of deluded companions gathers around him, great troubles ensue. In the reign of Emperor Xuanzong of Tang, the military governor of Bingzhou was sitting outdoors one night when he saw a column of red light rising from the southeast. Astonished, he said, "This is the aura of a Son of Heaven." The next day he searched among the commoners for any child born that night, but found none of remarkable appearance. He then searched among his subordinates, and found a newborn whose looks were most extraordinary. The governor said, "This is a false Son of Heaven." His attendants said, "If he is a false Son of Heaven, he is destined to rebel. Why not kill him now and root out future calamity?" The governor replied, "What Heaven has brought forth, who can destroy?" — Now, who was this child? None other than Yang Guifei's adopted son, An Lushan. It is said that An Lushan was a reincarnation of the Demon of Destruction, which is why he slaughtered the living, forced the emperor to flee in his carriage, and nearly overturned the dynasty. In the end, however, his body perished and his clan was exterminated, leaving him the name of a rebel and traitor. He at least accomplished something, seized some cities, and even called himself king and emperor for a time.

But then there are those who have no foundation whatsoever, who live in peaceful, prosperous times, yet who, merely because they have broad faces and large ears, fancy themselves Heaven-born emperors. They conspire with ruffians, dream of seizing the realm, and are bound hand and foot before they ever make a move — making less of a show than Qi Wannian or Song Jiang, who at least ran riot for a while. Is it not laughable?

Life's rank is not lightly won;

The nine-fold palace is no lucky gift.

The omen flares in the southern flatlands—

And blood congeals upon the blue-green earth, all for nothing.

Now let us speak of the Chenghua reign period, when in Yizhou of Baoding Prefecture in Hebei there lived a man named Hou. He had a son whom he called Lizhu, "Standing Pillar." The very moment of the boy's birth, a neighbour happened to be raising the main pillar of a new house. The father said, "What an auspicious day! When this boy grows up, he will surely be a jade pillar holding up the sky for our country." And so he was named Lizhu. From childhood the boy suffered frequent illness; his parents wished to place him in a Buddhist temple but had not yet done so. At six he began school under the name De-quan and proved a capable student. But misfortune struck: his parents died one after another, leaving him without support. A neighbour named Master Jin, following his parents' old wishes, sent the boy to Guangshou Monastery on Wolf Mountain to become a monk under the name Mingguo. His head was shaved to reveal a broad face, large ears, a wide forehead, and a prominent nose — truly a strange and striking appearance. Past the age of twenty, he wished to travel and study, to seek out enlightened teachers throughout the land. He packed his things, took leave of his abbot, and set out.

The bamboo hat tilts beneath the moon's morning shadow;

Wooden clogs crack in the frost of early dawn.

He washes his bowl in a running stream,

And rests his meditation against a tree's root.

Through battering winds and sheltering rains, enduring every hardship, he arrived at Shaolin Monastery in Henan. This temple was famed throughout the land for the excellence of its staff fighting. Moreover, the immortal Zhou Dian of the Ming dynasty and the Patriarch Bodhidharma of the Liang dynasty had both taken refuge here — it was a place where the distinguished sought lodging from all directions. Mingguo entered, paid his respects to the abbot, and settled in the guest quarters. Already present there was a Daoist. The two met and exchanged courtesies. The next day they walked together to the main hall, where a man came striding in from outside.

His beard floated in five streams on an immortal breeze;

His eyes were limpid as autumn waters, bright and clear.

His speech poured forth like a river cascading over falls,

And many a hero had been weighed upon his scales.

He looked Mingguo over and said, "What a fine countenance!" Mingguo bowed in greeting and asked, "Good sir, you read physiognomy?" The man replied, "I know a little — astrology and fortune-telling are my specialties." Mingguo said, "Then please, come to my quarters and give me a reading." When they were in the room, the fortune-teller took out paper and brush, and Mingguo recited his birth date and hour. The fortune-teller turned his hand, wrote out the eight characters, and arranged the cycles of fortune. He looked, then started violently and said, "Monk! You have such a noble birth chart! This chart speaks of wealth and honour beyond compare, authority without rival — it is the chart of a true emperor, beyond even the dignity of ministers and princes. In the future you shall have wife and son, and shall be exalted to the supreme position, with all the realm as your domain. The chart and the physiognomy are perfectly aligned. Only this: when your day of glory comes, do not forget this humble student, Jiang Zhao."

Mingguo said, "I am a monk with only a bowl and a bamboo hat, wandering with clouds and rivers for companions — I have never dreamed of wealth and renown. Surely you are mistaken, sir." The fortune-teller said, "Monk, consider our dynasty's founding emperor, Taizu — what manner of man was he? He too was a monk at Huangjue Monastery, and afterwards ascended the great throne. Your situation is precisely similar. It lies within human effort. I have read many fortunes in my life, and never found one this rare. I have read many people's charts, and never once been wrong."

I say that fortune-tellers in the rivers and lakes speak nothing but flattering nonsense. For merchants, every one is destined to be a millionaire; for scholars, every one will pass the examinations. But none of them dares promise a man the throne of an emperor — this Jiang Zhao had truly lost his mind. Yet when a man is flattered to his face, there is none who does not feel pleased. Even for something impossible, the initial reaction is surprise and denial — "there could be no such thing" — but eventually doubt creeps in: "Why would he say such things so lightly? Perhaps there is something to it after all?"

A common horse falsely promised the stature of a thoroughbred

Will still toss its head in the stall and dream of a thousand-li road.

Mingguo sat rapt, a faint smile playing on his lips, thinking to himself: How could an emperor's throne fall to me? Surely this gentleman has his reasons for saying what he said. And then the wandering Daoist standing nearby — this garrulous fellow called Zhou Daozhen — said, "The true sovereign is already known. People in the north all know it, and it is written here among us." He reached into his travelling bag and produced a book, in which was written: "In Qujiang Village, Chang'an County, Shaanxi, in the Li family of the Golden Basin — a mother carried her child for fourteen months and gave birth to a son named Long; red light filled the room and a white serpent coiled around him. When he grows up he shall have the destiny of a Son of Heaven."

Everyone read it. Zhou the Daoist said, "If Li Zilong is the true sovereign, then Monk, you are fated to be no more than a duke or marquis." The fortune-teller Jiang Zhao stood up and said, "Is this something one can promise to people lightly? If it does not come true, I shall never read another fortune. The enthronement will occur in the year of the Ox cycle, in the years of the Monkey or Rooster — trust me, I, the Iron-Capped Daoist Yuan Liuzhuang." Mingguo was overjoyed. He produced money and treated the two men to wine at a tavern, where they drank themselves senseless. Mingguo went about in high spirits, convinced he was a "founding emperor." Jiang Zhao was convinced he was "the Iron-Capped Daoist," and Zhou Daozhen was already imagining himself as "Liu Bowen."

The mad fool, blind and witless,

Lets his heart swell with dreams of wealth and power.

He thinks fish and water have joined at last —

Not knowing he has swum into a wood of disaster.

These two infatuated souls kept urging Mingguo to seize his opportunity. Mingguo parted from them and thought to himself: According to Jiang Zhao, I am destined to be the Son of Heaven; yet Zhou the Daoist says the true sovereign is Li Zilong. But what if I took on the name "Li Zilong" — then would that true destiny not be mine? Besides, our Taizu also grew his hair out before becoming emperor. I shall grow mine out too. He began as a wandering monk, then gathered his hair back and looked like a fine fighter. He had learned some staff techniques at Shaolin and now wished to make connections among bold men.

Northerners are in general fierce and strong, generous in their sense of honour but short on reasoning. When a man's passions are roused, he does not stop to ask whether what he is about to do should be done, whether it can be done, whether doing it will lead to good. There are, of course, acts that are right to do regardless of outcome — aiding a friend in distress without flinching from danger; dying in loyal service to one's country; dying in filial devotion to one's parents. These are acts that should be done. Whether they succeed or fail, the doing is noble. For brothers and friends, however, one must weigh: will helping him harm him instead? Will one's efforts fail and bring harm to oneself — the folly of jumping into a well to save a drowning man? Even acts that are right to do must be weighed for their likelihood of success and their probable outcomes. This is not cowardice. The Book says: "Against a father's enemy one does not live under the same sky; against a brother's enemy one does not lay down one's arms." Even righteous vengeance has its proper measure.

Righteous courage must never be absent;

But hot-headed bluster is never necessary.

When you restrain your anger, spare a thought for what follows —

Wisdom lies in dissecting things clearly.

As for using one's own bristling will to bully friends and family, to swagger against officials, to brawl and litigate endlessly, to be itching for a fight — these are things that ought not to be done, cannot be done well, and will lead nowhere good. To speak of killing men in fights, even in the name of standing up for the right — these are deeds of no consequence. How much worse, then, to do evil — at its most extreme, to covet what is not one's share, to gather a following and set oneself up as ringleader, or to attach oneself to another's scheme to seize royal power. These things must never be done, can never succeed, and if done, constitute treason against the state — a crime of the ten grave offences, beyond all pardon. In recent times, after the rebel hordes, came the White Lotus soldiers — and all of it sprung only from the same root: a culture of passion with no understanding of reason.

Without any legitimate foundation for winning the realm, the one exception was Ming Taizu. But that was because the Mongols had entered China and ruled as foreigners; by the time of Emperor Shun, the court was lost in debauchery and misgovernment; moreover, they filled positions of local magistrate and prefect with their own people, who had no understanding of the Chinese people's conditions and could not nurture or comfort them — and so the people's hearts turned toward unrest. First came those greedy and ignorant types who played the vanguard, throwing the realm into chaos. By that time the people's hearts were weary of war and blades, longing for someone to appear who would not kill and would not despoil — someone who loved the people and respected men of learning. And so Taizu of Ming moved in harmony with Heaven's heart and the people's will, and obtained the realm. Those who had done evil first gained only their own destruction and the extinction of their clans.

Heaven's heart ever blesses goodness;

The people's will returns to virtue.

Brute force calls down annihilation;

To misread the times is to destroy oneself.

The sage emperors succeeded one another, with not a single moral failing. Among officials there were of course wicked men, but there were many good ones too. This was no time of extremity awaiting a turn to chaos, no time of exhausted disorder awaiting the return of order. These foolish, stupid, violent men simply did not understand. What is more, their foolishness was compounded by greed: common people of the lowest rank dreamed of becoming dukes and barons, and so inflamed one another, and managed to deceive one or two reckless, arrogant hotheads.

They had their own connections, their own kind gathered around them. In places like Zhending they had already assembled a band of ruffians. Li Zilong had already given off certain signals. And there was a fortune-teller called Hei Shan who, unable to read other people's fates or his own — both men truly deserved the headsman's blade — looked at Li Zilong's chart and declared: "When the year of the monkey and rooster, the phoenix-crossroads, arrives — this is a great destiny." The years of the monkey and rooster were drawing near, and the plotting could not be delayed. Hei Shan attached himself to Li Zilong as chief strategist, using this prophecy to stir others up. Wherever men of physical prowess or wealthy landowners were found, he would read their fortunes, declare them destined for high office and great position, and draw them into the conspiracy. These men who had never opened a book — how else could they win official rank, unless through military merit? And without realizing it, they fell into his trap.

Too ignorant to read a single character,

Yet dreaming of caps and carriages and court rank!

Such ranks are not yours to dream of —

They will only bring disaster coiling around you.

Li Zilong and Hei Shan then put their heads together: "A great enterprise requires men; gathering men requires grain. The men we have outside are a motley rabble with no unified command. And we have no wealthy backer — when the moment comes, where will we find money? In the capital the garrison troops are numerous, and there are many bold men close at hand. If we can find people within the palace to help us, we won't need to procure weapons ourselves — every household has bows, arrows, spears, and swords. Many people inside the walls have property, and such people's appetites can be won over and stirred up. Get a few of them, and we'll never lack for funds." They wanted to enter the capital. Then a Daoist named Fang Shouzhen — another man who did not know his proper place — said: "Inside there is a man named Yang Daoxian, a military artisan with considerable wealth who distributes the monthly grain rations. All the poor soldiers in the capital depend on him in a pinch, and they all feel gratitude toward him. He has many borrowers coming to him, and he has long kept company with those inside the palace. He knows how to smooth things over and help people out; he is the open-handed sort, easy to befriend — a man of the heroic type."

The tiger and crocodile find their deep waters;

The hawk and falcon find their thickets.

Yet here, in the shadow of the imperial carriage,

Such weeds take root.

Hei Shan heard this and cried, "Excellent! This great undertaking depends entirely on him. We worried we had no men — he can cultivate these soldiers. We worried we had no money — he knows wealthy eunuchs who can provide it. As a military artisan, procuring weapons will be no trouble for him. We must attach ourselves to him." Birds of a feather, and these condemned fools drifted together and found themselves in agreement. Yang Daoxian saw that Li Zilong had a striking, extraordinary appearance. Hei Shan praised him extravagantly: "He is magnanimous and broad-minded, a man of rare ability who could set the age in order." Li Zilong in turn praised Hei Shan as unrivalled throughout the realm in his knowledge of the stars. Yang Daoxian then produced his own birth chart; Hei Shan looked at it and said, "What a splendid man of the serpent-embroidered robe and jade belt! A shade below Lord Li — you are like Curly-Beard who met Li Shimin. Li's enterprise will be fulfilled by Yang; Yang's fame and fortune will be won because of Li." By this point Yang Daoxian, having seen Li Zilong's appearance, already felt somewhat overshadowed by him. Hearing Hei Shan's words — which plainly indicated that Li Zilong was the master and he the assistant — he laughed and said, "I will put my trust in Lord Li." He then produced his wife's chart; Hei Shan declared, "This lady of the first rank — she too will wear the serpent embroidery and jade of the nobility." This was enough to set Yang Daoxian's heart burning.

When ambition for fame and rank consumes a man,

He strums the dragon-sword, barely kept in its scabbard.

But first he must know: is he truly a Han Xin or Peng Yue?

Rashly dreaming of fiefdoms and marquis titles is folly.

Yang Daoxian then kept the two men at his home. True to what had been said, he had connections inside the palace — men who had not risen very far: the palace attendants Bao Shi and Cui Hong; the personal servants Zheng Zhong, Wang Jian, and Chang Hao; Zhu Liang, Right Vice Superintendent of the Directorate of Ceremonial; and the gate officer Mu Jing. When they saw Li Zilong's broad face, large ears, lion nose, and sword-sharp brows, they thought him a man of quite extraordinary quality. And his speech poured forth like a flooding river, without pause or stop. He took the book of prophecies that Zhou Daozhen had given him, and in imitation of its style wrote out several talismans, declaring, "Wear these to ward off calamity and illness." Meanwhile Hei Shan and Yang Daoxian spread the word: "He can shout down city walls and split them apart, draw lines on the ground and turn them into rivers, scatter rice to create soldiers, cut grass to make horses, and send a flying sword to take an enemy's head — these and other extraordinary powers are his."

In general, when speaking to heroes one speaks of loyalty and honour, of fame and achievement; to simpletons one speaks of wealth and self-interest; and to ignorant men one speaks of ghosts and wild impossibilities — and there is none who will not be drawn in. These minor eunuchs had never received an education in the Inner Study Hall, never read history. Such groundless tales astonished and moved them, and they prostrated themselves before him as before a living Buddha. Hei Shan and Yang Daoxian then added to Li Zilong a formal title: "The Living World-Sustaining Buddha-King of Mercy, Who Relieves Suffering, Banishes Calamity, Loves Life, and Stops Killing — awaiting the years of the monkey and rooster to renew the realm and bring peace to the ten thousand people. Those who reveal this beforehand or fail to support him with all their hearts will be struck down by the divine spirits." None of these eunuchs dared spread the news abroad; only those who were their closest companions were brought to pay homage. One sent saddle and horse, another sent robes and clothing; gold, silver, and coin arrived in a steady stream. Li Zilong declared grandly: "These corrupting material objects — what use do I have for them? I leave them here to test the sincerity of your hearts." In the beginning the eunuchs treated him as a guest; gradually they all began calling him "Buddha-Lord" and "Holy Teacher," prostrating themselves before him, which he accepted with perfect composure. One day, Bao Shi and the others invited him to look around the palace interior. They walked to a small hall on Coal Hill, where only a single dragon bed was placed. Weary from walking, he sat himself down on it as naturally as if it were his own, and said, "We have our own golden thrones, silver thrones, lotus-blossom seats of treasure — what is there here to sit on? But Heaven has sent me down for the sake of all living creatures in the world, and before long I shall be obliged to sit here."

A wren claims a lofty branch;

A shallow-water fish swims in the pools of paradise.

He sighs that his resting place is unworthy of him —

The madman has no thought for what is distant.

The eunuchs said, "If only the Buddha-Lord were to take the throne, we servants would feel as though we had ascended to the Western Paradise." He sat a while, then left the Forbidden City. Everyone who had seen it praised him without a word of blame; on the contrary, they said he must indeed carry the destiny of a Son of Heaven — any ordinary man would have dropped dead on the spot, which only deepened their reverence and belief.

Then Li Zilong, Hei Shan, and Yang Daoxian conferred: "We must have coordination from within and without — neither can be lacking. Within, we now have these eunuchs; without, we rely on men in places like Zhending. But those heroes are too far away. We still need a military officer in the capital who can work in concert with the garrison troops." They settled on Zhu Guang, a centurion in the Imperial Guard — a kinsman of Bao Shi — and Wang Yuan, a junior officer — a kinsman of Zheng Zhong. They asked the two eunuchs to persuade these men to join. The two indeed came and enrolled themselves, promising to call up men at the appointed hour.

Born of families steeped in the dynasty's grace,

One should pour out one's loyalty without remainder.

Why choose to welcome treachery willingly,

And bring calamity upon one's descendants?

At this time there was a Grand Eunuch of the Imperial Stables named Wei Han. Though not attached to the Directorate of Ceremonial, he was among those closest to the emperor, a man of power and wealth. Bao Shi had originally been one of his household. Wei Han fell ill, and Bao Shi procured some of Li Zilong's talismanic water to help cure him — unexpectedly, he recovered. The eunuch was deeply grateful to Zilong, sent money in thanks, and even gave a banquet in his honour. He found Zilong's bearing and appearance most pleasing, and the two began to visit one another. Yang Daoxian said: "Good. With this man's money and influence, our enterprise is half achieved. But he is a man who understands something of principle and does not act rashly. If we tell him outright that this is treason, how could he possibly agree? Besides, we are pursuing wealth and power, whereas he is already wealthy and already powerful — why would he risk everything on such a dangerous venture? And if he refuses, the secret is out, and the damage will be severe. We must find a stratagem to win him over."

Hei Shan said, "Yang, you are the man of plans. You devise the strategy." Yang Daoxian thought a while and said, "I have it. He has a younger brother, Wei Xi, the second Wei, who is a rough, simple man and closest friends with Bao Shi. Wei Xi has a daughter of sixteen. The eunuch Wei has kept her close by him and has been looking for a match for her. But scholars don't want to marry into eunuch families, and noble military men mostly won't either. As for merchants and wealthy householders, the eunuch won't settle for them. But at the palace the eunuch has already expressed admiration for Brother Li's extraordinary bearing. Now let us use Bao Shi to speak to the second Wei first, and then to the eunuch. If the matter succeeds, Li Zilong becomes the eunuch's kinsman by marriage — their fates will be bound together — and we need not fear him refusing." Li Zilong said, "If it means taking a wife, I fear that is not the conduct of a holy teacher like me." Hei Shan said, "We have our words ready to move him."

Like the strategist who talked a kingdom into surrender with one tongue,

He fears not the sudden reversal —

Not knowing there will come a change within,

And his neck will find the boiling cauldron.

Just then Bao Shi came to see Yang Daoxian and said, "Eunuch Wei deeply respects the Holy Teacher, saying he is no ordinary man." Hei Shan said, "This matter depends entirely on you." Yang Daoxian said, "But lately something troubling has occurred. The Holy Teacher has been saying, 'What is so good about being emperor? It only brings worry and bother' — as if he has grown weary of it. Our dukedoms and marquisates are nearly within reach, but if he simply drifts away, all our plans come to nothing. Money and fine things, he calls them worldly goods and cares nothing for them — we cannot hold him with those. As an emperor he would need an empress, the three palaces and six courts — so let us try to keep him with a woman. A prostitute would be impure, and he would certainly refuse. It must be a proper first wife, and she must be a woman of good fortune. What is more, the family must be one that stands to gain as imperial in-laws. Among us, none has a daughter or female relative of the right sort, so we are at a loss."

Bao Shi said, "The Holy Teacher is a Buddhist — how can he want a wife?" Hei Shan said, "The ancient translator Kumarajiva was himself a great Buddha of old. The King of the Western Qin once sent him ten palace women, one of whom bore him two sons — there is precedent." Bao Shi said, "Well then, Eunuch Wei has a niece. I have seen her — she has a most auspicious, prosperous look. The eunuch holds the Holy Teacher in high regard. Let me first speak to the second Wei, and have him put it to the eunuch."

The small bird hopes to nestle against the phoenix;

The bream and carp dream of riding the dragon.

They imagine a humble thatched cottage

Aglow with brilliant candle-light.

Hei Shan said, "Even though Eunuch Wei respects the Holy Teacher, nothing about our true plans must be told to him. Just say that considering the Holy Teacher's noble appearance, if one day the eunuch were to lend him a little assistance, he might well become a civil official of secretary rank, or certainly a Brocade Guard commander. Put it in those terms." Bao Shi said, "I will follow what you say." The second Wei said, "Let us consult the eunuch." When he broached the matter with his elder brother, the eunuch did not inquire too closely into Li Zilong's origins, simply saying, "He is a fine-looking man. With my backing, I can certainly get him an official cap. My niece is grown, and I won't bother about a bride-price." He also gave Li Zilong a house outside the Eastern Flowery Gate, along with a dowry of a thousand gold pieces, and chose an auspicious day for the wedding.

Slender reeds drift with the current,

Floating this way and that with no fixed course.

Who could have expected the lotus flower

To come gradually and settle in their company?

Before this, Li Zilong had been living in Yang Daoxian's house as a vagrant of unknown origin. Now he was the kinsman of a great eunuch. Each day he rode tall horses and dressed in magnificent broad robes, commanding servants and receiving visitors. I say: for a man of low station who had wandered the land penniless, taking holy orders for want of an alternative, with neither wife nor home, to now have a wife and money at his disposal — he might well have been content to stop and count his blessings. But those who were chasing wealth could not stop. One kept bringing new adherents; another kept drawing in more recruits. That insatiable appetite stirred again and again within him, and with the years of the monkey and rooster drawing near, he could not bring himself to turn these people away. So the affair gradually grew more visible.

At this time there was a Brocade Guard soldier named Sun Xian who lived next door to an impoverished militiaman named Gan Xiao. This Gan Xiao was destitute in the most severe degree, and constantly endured hunger with his wife. His wife would rail at him bitterly, and he would say, "Enough. Endure for another six months or three more — I'll run with him and gamble on getting a centurion's position. A proper seventh-rank salary would be more than enough for the two of us. Bear it a little longer." Sun Xian overheard him, and the next day said to him, "Old Gan, you've found some good prospects — can you drag a fellow along?" Gan Xiao said, "If I could drag you along, what could you drag for me?" Sun Xian said, "Brother, many ships don't clog a harbour. If I get something good out of it, I won't forget your kindness." Knowing Gan Xiao was fond of drink, that evening Sun Xian spent three parts of his money on burning-knife spirits and two parts on beef, and invited him to eat — hoping Gan would point him in the right direction. After a few cups of wine, Gan Xiao began waving his hands and pointing to the sky: "I can't bring you along myself, but there is a Holy Teacher Li who can. However it turns out, let me take you tomorrow and present you to him — bow down before him and sign on. I guarantee you'll do well."

Wine enters from without;

Secrets escape from within.

Regret is born of sobriety;

A team of four horses cannot outrun the tongue.

The next day Sun Xian came to find him. Gan Xiao kept his mouth shut and went back on the invitation for several days, but at last had to take Sun Xian to meet Li Zilong. Sun Xian kowtowed and swore an oath: "With one heart and unified strength, I will assist the Holy Teacher, relieve suffering among the living, and shall never waver or retreat. Should I hold a second intention, may the flying sword divide my body and my whole family be destroyed." Sun Xian had no choice but to swear the oath and join the milling throng. He then carefully memorized all the comings and goings inside the operation, observing and probing east and west, and came to understand that this was treason. He learned that the date had been set for the seventh month of the year jiwei, coinciding with the years of the monkey and rooster, when they would coordinate from within and without to first take the capital.

At this time Eunuch Wei Han was just about to arrange for Li Zilong's appointment as a secretary, and spoke of it to the second Wei. The second Wei said, "Elder brother, his aspirations are much greater — he does not want a position like that." Wei Han said, "What sort of position does he want?" The second Wei said, "He wants to be the one who governs the officials." And he whispered the whole story to Wei Han: that Li Zilong's birth chart and physiognomy both pointed to the destiny of a true Son of Heaven; that arrangements outside the capital were already complete, that there were supporters within, and that all they needed was Wei's help to tip the balance. When the deed was done, they would be not merely imperial kinsmen but founding meritorious officials. This speech fell on Wei Han's ears and:

His tongue froze and would not descend;

His jaw locked and no word could emerge.

Cold sweat fell from him like rain;

His spirit nearly fled his body.

Wei Han stood struck dumb, and the second Wei said, "Elder brother, this matter is already beyond your choosing. Help him and there will be rewards. Refuse and the deed may still be done — you will not be able to walk away either." Wei Han heard him, shocked and furious. To make a scene and expose everything would be scandalous. To go along with it — he was a trusted intimate of the court, wearing the serpent-embroidered robe and jade belt, already at the pinnacle of wealth and honour — and now to be drawn into this annihilating catastrophe? Yet there was no way out; he had made the mistake of giving his niece to Li Zilong in marriage, and now he truly could not walk away. He was sunk in dark gloom.

Meanwhile Li Zilong and Yang Daoxian had secretly prepared a saffron-yellow imperial robe and a Yishan cap, just like costumes for a play, only waiting for the drums and cymbals to sound. The yellow robe was already prepared to be slipped on, waiting only for the edict to be slipped out from beneath their sleeves.

But in the capital, the eunuch Cao Jixiang and his nephew had once attempted rebellion. He had a kinsman in the Forbidden City, nephews three or four, and had kept trained frontier cavalry and household troops — and even then it came to nothing. How much less could a handful of idle, minor eunuchs, a petty military officer, and a few destitute soldiers dream of bringing it off?

Unknown to them, Sun Xian had already understood the scheme fully and reported it to Yuan Bin, the commander in charge of the guard seal. Officers were immediately sent to arrest Li Zilong; a search of his belongings turned up the yellow robe. Yang Daoxian and Hei Shan were also arrested. The yellow robe was all the evidence of treason needed.

Yuan Bin, however, was a man who had followed the emperor in the desert and earned his rank through loyal service — a man of honest and generous character. Another man might have used this as an opportunity to engineer a grand political purge. But Yuan Bin would not. Besides, the affair touched people in the inner palace, and they were sure to beg and pull strings; he had no desire to spread the net too wide. He said, "These disciples who enrolled under him are mostly ignorant, destitute commoners. To call it treason — the secret plot had not yet been carried out, and these were merely a few deluded men who had devised plans. Even kinsmen among them were unaware. How could one drag all these simple-minded people into the case?"

A great grace loosened the net,

The verdant deer was spared from the pursuit.

The hare escaped the tangled pull,

The lotus gladly shed its confining case.

Zhu Guang, being an officer, and Bao Shi, being a palace eunuch, could not be concealed. Yuan Bin had no choice but to submit a memorial reporting the case with a brief summary of the confessions. Because the affair involved palace personnel, influence was brought to bear, and the imperial edict was not severe. But the case was already before the Three Judicial Offices.

Eunuch Wei Han thought: Li Zilong's treason is a fact, and I am his close kinsman by marriage. Even if the Guards office covered for me, the judicial offices would not conceal it. And the supervising censorate — their tongues are no trifling thing. If they file a memorial accusing me, a trusted intimate, of consorting with rebels, how will that end? If the emperor finds out and sends me for questioning and execution, I would rather die first with an intact body. And so he swallowed poison and died.

With a body basking in the light of the sun and moon,

What more could wealth and honour ask for?

Shame — to end as cold ashes drowned in mire,

A southland captive in captivity's chains.

A pity, this Eunuch Wei — he was only a man led astray by others. The remaining men went before the judicial offices. As the initial confessions tend to follow the records of the Guards office, the presiding officials did the same, adding some language of their own before presenting to the higher bench. The senior judges submitted a memorial: "Li Zilong, Yang Daoxian, Hei Shan, Zhu Guang, and Bao Shi — five persons as principal conspirators. Cui Hong, Zheng Zhong, Wang Jian, Chang Hao, Song Liang, Mu Jing, and Wang Yuan — as accessories, all sentenced to execution. Jiang Zhao, Zhou Daozhen, and Fang Shouzhen and their associates — to be summoned and tried."

But His Majesty, in his generous clemency, recognized that this rabble of mad fools had brought destruction upon themselves, and that the eunuch personnel were merely stupid men led astray. He ordered only the five principal conspirators — Li Zilong and the rest — executed without delay. Cui Hong and his group were sentenced to serve as garrison soldiers; Wang Yuan was reassigned to a different unit; the others were sentenced as recommended. It is laughable: Li Zilong the madman who dreamed of the supreme nine-five position; Yang Daoxian and Hei Shan and Zhu Guang who dreamed of becoming founding barons and meritorious nobles; Bao Shi who had his eye on the great Directorate of Ceremonial — in the end, their reward was:

The cage is opened by imperial grace and favour;

The proud heads laugh in their foolish faces.

What has become now of your wealth and glory?

Corpses lie across the ancient roadside.

True to form, a supervising secretary named Lei in the Bureau of Punishments memorialized: that Bao Shi and the rest had colluded between the inner and outer palaces to plot rebellion — their crimes were extreme and their guilt was grave; the law as applied was too lenient relative to their offences; without harsher punishment there was no way to deter mad schemes or uphold the law of the realm. He requested that Wang Yuan and all those originally sentenced to execution be beheaded in full. His Majesty chose leniency: "The matter has been handled; there is no need for deeper inquiry." Though powerful internal forces were at work here, there was still the question of casting a wide net for those who had paid homage to Li Zilong among soldiers and commoners in the capital, and pursuing and arresting his former associates and ruffians outside — and this gave rise to no small number of further complications.

Strict punishment for the primary plotters,

Broad clemency for the peripheral followers.

Chasing shadows and catching the wind

Spares the people from unnecessary upheaval.

I reflect: among the four orders of society, scholars seek office, farmers seek to preserve their family holdings, artisans and merchants seek to expand their profits — and these are enough. As for the nine streams and lesser occupations, even those who live by their wits to earn a mouthful need to speak with some sense of what is reasonable. Monks and Daoists of the highest kind illuminate their minds, perceive their nature, cultivate their spirit, and seek liberation from the cycle of death and rebirth. Those of the lower sort chant sutras and pray for the emperor's longevity, thereby earning their daily meal. This is what Ming Taizu called "each occupying his proper livelihood and committing no transgression." But when a fortune-teller goes so far as to promise a man the throne of an emperor; when a wandering, begging monk dreams of becoming the Son of Heaven; when Yang Daoxian — a man of wealth already — does not seek an official position and rest content with his family fortune; when Zhu Guang, holding a hereditary rank, does not cherish even that inherited official's cap; when Bao Shi as an inner palace official has his own livelihood to keep — why then did these men, in their foolish and reckless way, come to a death like this?

Such monstrous and deluded talk must never, ever be heeded. A man is better off poor to the point of starvation, so long as he remains a law-abiding subject. These people staked their heads and lost — and earned into the bargain the name of rebel and traitor. Is it not laughable? And so for those of the common people: all should be diligent and cautious in their conduct, each practicing his own craft and livelihood, each protecting his body and household. Do not covet distant wealth and fame and renown, only to forfeit the family and home you already have.